“Men Need Freedom”

I was listening to Lewis Howes on a podcast, or maybe it was a clip and he goes “men need freedom.” I’m not crazy about this idea, but I prefer to have a conversation about potentially controversial thoughts in order to create growth and harmony, then to let them fester behind closed doors.

The ideas of masculinity and femininity are so frequently polarized. Women need this, men need that. We are seen as opposite ends of a spectrum, when in reality my experiences have shown me something quite different.

One of my favorite things to look at on dating subreddits is men talking about their experiences with women. Guess what? They get ghosted, bread crumbed, and wind up in bed with narcissists as well. The idea that women are the only people that deal with these kinds of romantic crises’ is naïve.

I’ve spent too much time around women and seen their rampant narcissism and control issues come into play and warp my life. I’ve also experienced the same issue with men. At some point delineating romantic negativity as something that exists on one side of the gender spectrum prevents us from seeing that we are all fallen humans.

Men need freedom. This was a weird thought to come across. It was weird to me because I’ve been single for 5 years and when I think about a relationship, the last thing I want to do is sink myself into codependency. The idea of clinging to someone because my attachment fears are full fledged terrifies me. I would rather be single.

Men need freedom. Then what do I need? I feel like the key to a romantic relationship is to understand your needs and find someone that can mirror them back to you. Men need freedom and women need freedom. Men that need freedom should be with women that need freedom. Women that need freedom should be with men that need freedom. Love is about finding what is unique about you in another person.