I’m at risk of dating burn out. I went on 8 dates in 9 days. It was worth it. I guess I’m building a skill set when it comes to dating that will probably serve me well in other areas of life.
I haven’t had any follow up dates though. I don’t think ill of the men I’ve met with. Most of them have been really nice and I don’t make them spend a lot on me (a drink or some fries is fine, you don’t have to take me out to dinner).
There are some that are exclusively just looking for sex. This is a weird situation to be in. My favorite dates are in a bar, with a drink and a conversation. The worst ones wind up with a dude getting me into his apartment “I need to drop something off.” You know what? He doesn’t.
Boundaries are sexy. Gauging my comfort level in a given situation is sexy. Me winding back up in your apartment and you being like “this is the sexy time now” is not sexy. It’s uncomfortable. And while it’s not non consensual, it’s definitely not what I was ready for. I am now awkwardly fending off physical contact and politely explaining that my boundaries have been rehashed after I got really into 90s East Asian cinema.
But burn out. I’m really limiting my engagement with the apps right now and trying to hole up in my energy. It kind of makes me a bit flighty communication wise, but in person I am more engaged. I know my social battery is sort of hitting 0%, but I also feel like an athlete who is adjusting to a new workout routine. It’s only a matter of time before what was once challenging becomes effortless.
a soft death 