Scalpel

Another post! I don’t know if this is a good idea. Not the blog thing, but this post. I was thinking I should probably get into the habit of writing more, like trying to write as much as possible. According to Gary Vaynerchuk, just keep churning out content on social media. I don’t know how this advice works out with a blog. Honestly I’m being anxious. I know that. I am actually kinda serious about this blog. Like I kinda want to invest quite a bit of energy into it. I am seeing this as like a potentially 2-3 year journey, at minimum.

It’s a bit wild to be at the start of something I want to put 2-3 years of effort into. I am not particularly concerned about it not working out. I can say “I tried my best.” But starting a new venture is kind of like being in the desert, there isn’t much to sustain you. You’re in a barren environment and you have to force out a survival, somehow.

I had a psychic reading done to start out the new year. I asked for messages from my ancestors relating to my career. They said I didn’t take instruction well, that I was better off being self employed or in a leadership role. They said my need for autonomy is an ancestral trend, that previous generations became industrious, resourceful, and independent, because they had to in order to survive.

I texted my uncle part of my reading and noted my need for autonomy and inability to take instruction. He responded “Oh yes, that’s very you. You were giving your parents pushback from a young age. You knew what you wanted and God help others who disagree with the line of your thought.”

So here I am, writing. Trying to make something of my writing. There really aren’t a lot of readers, and there probably won’t be for a while. I’m going to be spending hours just putting together posts, editing, re-editing. At some point the friends who regularly read my blog will fall off because it’s not their job to keep my self esteem afloat. After that, I’m out in the wild of the internet with my stream of consciousness writing that literary legends would spit on, hoping it can be a vessel for survival.